Pilots’ Hell

Pilots' Hell - Military humor

A MAC pilot died at the controls of his plane and went to pilots’ hell, where he found a hideous devil and three doors. The devil was busy escorting other pilots to various “hell rooms.” “I’ll be right back–don’t go away,” said the devil, and he vanished.

Sneaking over to the first door, he peeked in and saw a cockpit where the pilot was condemned to forever run through preflight checks. He slammed that door and peeked into the second. There, alarms rang and red lights flashed while a pilot had to avoid one emergency after another.

Unable to imagine a worse fate, he cautiously opened the third door. He was amazed to see a pilot getting ready for a flight while crew chiefs dilligently put the final touches on a perfectly-maintained aircraft, even bringing him coffee and saluting him sharply as they presented the forms for his approval.

He quickly returned to his place seconds before the devil reappeared. “Okay,” said the devil, “Which door will it be, number 1 or number 2?”

“Um, I want door number 3,” answered Mac.

“Sorry,” said the devil. “You can’t have door number 3. That’s crew chiefs’ hell.”